It’s Okay To Feel Homesick
When people talk about moving and living abroad, they often romanticise it. But the reality is that even though you will have the time of your life, there are downsides that come with it. One of them is living far away from your friends and family. Although it’s very normal to feel homesick, it’s always good to know how to deal with these feelings. I collected some of my strategies on how to handle homesickness.
Stay Busy
My number one recommendation is to try to keep busy. When you move to another country or even another city it’s important not to just sit in your room and feel sad about being away from home (although it is important to feel these feelings but more about that later).
I never really experienced homesickness when I was abroad until I moved to England in 2019. I was supposed to start my master’s around September but decided to move to my new home a few weeks earlier – big mistake. My idea was to use this time to find a part-time job in my area while I was doing my master’s. The job search turned out to be very difficult, and I felt a bit isolated. I didn’t really know anyone besides my housemates. Since I am not someone who enjoys sightseeing that much, I was also quite fed up with playing tourist after a few days. That’s when the homesickness started creeping in. I missed my family so much and felt like I made a bad decision in leaving so early for my course.
The first time I lived abroad was in California and it was completely different. I arrived only a few days before the semester started. What felt stressful at that time was also kind of smart because I did not even have time to feel homesick. Looking back I would always recommend trying to stay busy when you arrive in a new place. It helps you to avoid spiralling and experiencing homesickness or loneliness because you have too much time to think.
Decorate Your Room
To me, it never mattered if I stayed in place for two months or a year, I always wanted to decorate my room. It might sound silly to some people but it just means making yourself at home in your new room/house. And decoration does not have to be extravagant or super expensive. I usually just put printed-out pictures onto the wall or crafted something. Or I found some affordable fairy lights and bought some pillows.
When I lived in South Korea I stayed in a Goshiwon (Mini-Studio). These Mini-Studios are extremely small and when I first arrived I was a bit shocked. On one hand, by the small size. On the other hand, I was shocked by how horrible it looked. It’s not uncommon to arrive in your new home and be a bit overwhelmed or irritated by things that are different to what you’re used to. Usually, you are also a little exhausted from a long journey, so your emotions might be all over the place. It’s important at this moment to give yourself time to adjust. But to me, it always really helped to decorate a little and just make the space “my space”.
Looking for decorations or crafting something is also a good way of keeping busy if you don’t have other important things to do. Especially, in the evening homesickness can occur. So make yourself some tea, put on your favourite music (or a podcast) and just focus on creating a space where you feel at home.
Build Your Own Traditions
When staying abroad long-term you need to come to terms with feeling homesick once in a while. I personally feel homesickness creep up around the holidays like Christmas and New Year. So far I have always managed to fly back home to celebrate Christmas with my family, except for 2022. That was the first time when I did not go back to celebrate with my family. I had just moved to Lisbon and the prices for flights were outrageous.
In these moments it’s important to start building your own traditions and finding people that are in the same situation. I spent my Christmas cooking dinner with some lovely girls and we had the best conversations over some glasses of wine. It was not the same as it would’ve been with my family but it was good and brought me closer together with my friends.
Take Care Of Your Physical Health
When these feelings of homesickness start coming up, it also makes sense to check in with your physical health. That means asking yourself questions like: Did I have enough sleep? Did I eat enough? Were my last meals nutritious? Did I move my body today?
If you are tired, hungry or haven’t eaten well your emotions will be all over the place. So make sure to take care of yourself physically and don’t make any big decisions when you haven’t slept a lot or skipped meals.
When I arrived in Seoul I had been travelling for almost 24 hours and I was exhausted. It was in the middle of the day and I just moved into my new home for the next 8 weeks. First I hated the room and felt really overwhelmed by the whole situation. I had never been to Asia before and I felt a little bit lost. I did not know where I could go and buy something to eat and I just wanted to sleep. Additionally, I couldn’t figure out where to get a Covid PCR test done, which was required to do in the first two days of arrival. I tried googling and calling places but because I did not speak any Korean it was a challenge. My first few hours in South Korea felt, therefore, super overwhelming and I definitely cried a little. BUT realistically I knew that I was just exhausted and that I should not make any big decisions or judgements about my trip yet.
I decided to go find some food, walk around a little bit and have an early night in to recharge. And this worked wonders. While wandering around the streets I was able to see a bit of my new neighbourhood but also moved my body a little (walks are just so wonderful for your mental health). The next day I was able to solve all my problems with a fresh mind.
Try New Hobbies
When you’re feeling homesick it can also help to find new hobbies to distract yourself. Think about all the reasons why you moved abroad and the possibilities this movie gave you. When I moved to Portugal I started to paint more. Painting on the beach is something that’s not possible in Switzerland (due to the lack of beaches). So use your new environment to make amazing memories, and learn new skills. Who knows maybe you’ll even connect with new people through your new hobby.
Treat Yourself To Some Comfort Food
When you’re wondering how to stop homesickness, it is important to take care of your physical needs – nutrition is one part of it. But food can also have an emotional effect on your well-being. Especially comfort food, which is whatever you decide it to be. It can be something that reminds you of home, maybe your favourite snacks, or just something greasy or carb-heavy. Yes, it’s important to take care of your physical needs and eat balanced but sometimes it’s just as important to eat whatever your heart desires. If that’s a piece of chocolate cake at a bakery around the corner or pizza in bed, you decide whatever makes you feel good.
Also bonus point here is that you might discover new places if you for example take yourself out on a coffee date or discover a nice takeout place in your area.
Make New Friends
When you arrive in a new place it’s important to build up a support system. Especially if your family is far away it’s important to find people you can connect with (it’s like building your own little family far away from home). Finding new connections can play a big part in how to overcome home sickness. It will give you a reason to leave the house, to make conversation but it can also help to share these feelings of homesickness with like-minded people.
Especially if you’re new friends are also internationals, they will for sure have experienced similar feelings and they will understand what situation you’re in. Talking about feeling homesick can make it feel less scary and together with your friends you can figure out how to deal with feeling homesick.
Feel The Feelings
Although it is important to distract yourself, make sure to also feel these feelings. That can include crying, calling your family or listening to sad music and just feeling sad. It is absolutely okay to have these feelings and once they’re there they won’t just disappear. So it’s better to process them.
However, if you follow my other tips you can also make sure that you are not feeling homesick because you’re lonely, you’re feeling uncomfortable in your own space or you are just exhausted. Don’t make any big decisions when you are not feeling well but try to figure out why you are feeling this way.
It’s Okay To Feel Homesick
If you follow my tips I can’t guarantee you that you won’t ever feel homesick, but I can guarantee you that you will learn how to cope with it. I felt homesick a few times when I moved abroad but I always managed to work through it and the experience that follows these feelings is indescribably beautiful.
How do you deal with homesickness? Leave your tips in the comments!
Angela
Angela, the mastermind behind theslowtravelista, is a passionate traveler who embraces slow travel's essence. With a knack for immersing herself in diverse cultures, she treasures connections formed across the globe. Beyond her adventures, Angela's vibrant personality shines through her love for spontaneous hair changes, hitchhiking escapades, and culinary delights. Join her for travel insights, laughter, and unforgettable adventures.
